I'M A CHRISTIAN...NOW WHAT?
Dear Family: Due to what my Optometrist, Dr. Standish, calls “fast growing cataracts” I have been struggling with my eyesight for the past several months, especially the last few weeks, until about ten days ago it got to the point that I could not read my computer screen, nor could I read my current PSYC textbook, even with +4.5 reading glasses and a ten power magnifying glass because the translucent cataracts amplify light and causes “white out” blindness. The textbook is printed in small text, grey ink, on a semi-glossy coated paper which reflects light, all of which work against me. I have been compensating by installing a forty inch computer monitor, setting it on high contrast and enlarging the image to 160%. This has allowed me to fulfill my written assignments but enlarging the screen does not help with my McGraw-Hill ilearn math class as the enlargement process does not make the numerical symbols larger, it only makes the outside borders larger.
For all of the above reasons I am having to bite the bullet and take a failing grade in my math class and then retake the course after my eye surgeries. My next two classes for the Fall sub-term “B” includes one Christian Counseling course and a PSYC class regarding Research Methods in Psychology. The textbooks will arrive this Friday and it is my hope and prayer that I will be able to read those texts, if not I will have to drop the classes and wait for the surgery funding to kick in, hopefully sooner rather than later.
The good news: After a thorough exam last Thursday, the good Dr. told me that my eyes are exceptionally healthy, the cataracts notwithstanding. He said that I will have near perfect (20/15) vision after the surgeriesJ! The procedure takes just a few minutes per eye and recovery time is about an hour for each of two procedures. My personal attitude is that it is all in God’s Hands, and He has never let me down--if for some reason (that I cannot yet understand) He needs a blind preacher then that is fine with me—but even under the worst case scenario it is just a matter of months before funding kicks in and my eyesight is restored.
In the meantime Grace Community Fellowship, my local congregation, is beginning an evangelistic push in Helena and I have been blessed to be part of that effort—I see all of this as a win/win situation: If I do have to temporarily suspend classes at LUO then that will allow me to evangelize Helena full time. If my eyesight is restored sooner than later I will be able to both attend classes and evangelize several hours per week, primarily on weekends. My Dr. tells me that even though I will become “legally blind” without the surgery, I will not become “completely” blind—I will still be able to see shapes—I won’t be able to drive but I will be able to do the most important things; evangelize, cook, clean, etc.
Thank you all for your prayers and walking through this with me. It is all in God’s hands—He can supernaturally heal me, He can make it a progressive healing, an instant healing, a healing through medical science, or keep me in this state and restore my eyesight in Paradise—it is all according to His will and in His kairos (appointed) time. “All things work together for good…” (Romans 8:26-31, NKJV read entire context). That passage does not say that everything that happens to believers is good—it says that our experiences in life work together for good. I like Kent Hovind’s analogy: If you came to my house for breakfast and I offered you a cup of raw, dry flower, or a raw egg, a tablespoon of salt and some baking powder for breakfast you would probably not be interested—but collectively these things work together to make biscuits; and so it is with life in this currently broken world; all things work together to make biscuits for those who believe J !